Tuesday, 17 June 2014

Always Expect The Unexpected

So all has been relatively well, but as we all know when it starts to rain it pours. I switched over from my oral bisphosphonate to an intravenous one that I will now receive every four weeks. Dr. Webster told me about the potential for “flu-like” symptoms. I kind of just shrugged at that and really thought this would be easy peasy. Well, the infusion itself was quick and simple. Those “flu-like” symptoms did happen later that day, however I would describe it using slightly different words: F*ck*n AWFUL!! It was more like an excruciating bone pain where you are left questioning yourself over and over if you actually may have broken something. I ambulated like a 95year old grandmother, pretty pathetic for a 28year old. Not to mention the fever that accompanied the pain for 3days; it totalled to a waste of 3 days!!!!!!!!!! Now to most people that may not seem like a long time, however when you require this medication every month forever, then it becomes 3days too much! I missed out on a coffee date and dinner plans, so that left me a bit peeved off, plus I was supposed to walk 3km that weekend to support my wonderful friend. As I sat on the couch I wondered how I could walk that far (which typically wouldn’t be far at all) when it took me a couple minutes just to get up off the couch all the while cursing from the pain. I thought there’s no way I can possibly walk like this especially since this was a family affair with kids and there was no way on earth I was going to curse away and get kicked out of a charity walk! So I simply had to wait and see when these lovely side effects would disappear.

I can say by Saturday morning I felt good. So away I went and had an absolutely perfect day, supporting my dear friend and her little man. After we were done I realized my hubby had called and texted me a few times. Not thinking much of it I called him only for him to tell me he was in urgent care!! Wait, where?????? Yuppers, he had injured his knee at work and when he tried to get up that morning, lets just say he moved as quick as I did just a couple days earlier. So I rushed to urgent care and sat with him. Apparently his years of playing football had totally destroyed his knee and there wasn’t much they could do. You know it’s not great when there’s a group of healthcare workers looking at an x-ray and discussing how awful it looks. Well that’s wonderful because we totally had nothing else on our plate! After spending over 4hrs in urgent care, Chris hobbled out with a zimmer and crutches.

The best part is that we have planned a road trip to California for this weekend and now we are kind of in limbo. Between appointments, treatments, scans, and Chris’ work schedule we had found our window of opportunity to get away and then of course life needs to get in the way, grrrr. So I also decided to get an oil change and service my car since we are planning on driving. When I went to pick my car up the gentleman tells me what they did and then goes on to tell me, “Your breaks are really close to needing to be repaired.” I responded by telling him, “Well I’m driving to California so will I make it there and back?” He looks at me and tells me, “Well… that may be close.” My response, “Ok, that doesn’t sound super promising, like I’m not going to plunge to my death down a mountain cause my breaks don’t work am I?” He looks at me and says, “Oh… probably not.” hmm.. Probably not doesn’t work for me, I need to hear definitely not so I look at him and say, “what’s your name so that in case me and my husband plunge to our deaths my family can place blame on somebody!” Not even kidding, his response was a pause with a nervous laugh, all whilst not telling me his name. That’s promising for sure I thought. So that was that and I thought could these all be signs to not take a darn vacation???

Whatever happens we will make the most of it, and I am still optimistic we will be able to go, zimmer, crutches, and all. Heck, I’ll stick him in a wheelchair and get a handicap sign and think of the phenomenal parking we will get everywhere we go! Yes, we will make this work one way or other because, after all, we are quite obviously a dream team of a couple in regards to our health! California here we come, slowly but surely we‘ll get there (Just please let us make it to the border, at least)!!!

I’m smiling because I am beyond clueless as to how utterly crappy I’ll feel in about 8hrs. My bones better be as flippin strong as wonder woman because I felt the pain!!! I must say thank you to Megan for stocking up the adult world with popsicles, made my dayJ As well, your mom is lovely and reminds me a lot of you! Why does the adult world not have popsicles??

Who wouldn't want to eat this precious little peanut up???
Another perfect little babe!!!
Lennox is incredible:)
Our amazing team!!
Me and Chris in urgent care. Maybe I shouldn't be smiling??


Monday, 9 June 2014


In the last four months I have had 2CTs, 2MRIs, 2ECHOs, and a bone scan. I was given the greatest gift from my amazing friends, a wonderful trip with my mom, and many fabulous outings with some wonderful friends and their perfect little babes. It amazes me when you focus on each day how time doesn’t simply fly by as when you work. You get to enjoy each day for what it’s worth, and I find myself not looking forward to what I’m doing in a week or in a month, but simply focusing on today. I can say I have had the highest highs and the lowest lows.

When I first got diagnosed just over two years ago, I became obsessed with googling everything, something I do not recommend! I remember one site where you could put in your tumour biology, age, receptor status etc… and it would tell you your overall survival. So I did it. Well it not only gave you a percentage, but you could get those stats in a bar graph or a pie chart. Seriously telling me the number wasn’t enough, but lets draw a pie chart so that you could see your minimal chance of living ten years. Since then I have realized that these are simply averages and every person is so different that these numbers just go on to scare the crapola out of you. If I could tell anyone with cancer something it would be to not waste your time googling stats because they may very well not pertain to you.

So I had been pondering how much money is raised for anything and everything breast cancer related. It all seems so wonderful, however when you read some of the statistics it becomes a bit disturbing. What bothers me the most is the distribution of money. The fact is that less than two percent of funds raised for breast cancer goes towards metastatic breast cancer. Wait a minute, how does this make any sense whatsoever??? People don
t die from localized cancer they die as a direct result from metastasis, so why are we not investing more money into this?? We all love the feel good story of women who beat their early stage disease, but I must say our focus on what needs to be done is so distorted. Don’t get me wrong many services that are provided in regards to patient and family support services are great, however I have moved past the need for this for MYSELF. I want better treatment options, services that enhance my quality of life by reducing pain, clinical trials, and essentially a CURE. Time is not on my side, so when I look at charities I want money invested towards it’s science and research. We have sugar coated this disease as if it’s something “fun” with all the pink that when you read the fine print on products that are meant to support breast cancer it says five cents goes towards the “cure.” Really?? What I hate is that it has become some form of a popularity contest. You have the people who are survivors, and what about those of us who are surviving?? Even when you look at Cancer Centers in the United States and they publish their survival rates. Some sound astoundingly promising and then you research into it and realize that some of these centers will only accept patients with early stage disease in which these people already have a promising outlook, regardless of where they seek treatment. Some won’t accept patients with late stage disease as this can skew their survival stats, and ultimately affect the amount of revenue they generate. How f*ck*d up is this????? Until someone is personally affected by this disease it seems that the only focus is geared towards personal profit.

The current figures (depending on where you look) show that 50% of men and 33% of females will get cancer in their lifetime. That’s fairly significant and just because you personally may not have been affected yet, sadly the odds are someone you love will. When I donate money to a cause I am not donating to allow a single individual to live a lavish lifestyle because they are the CEO of a charity. I understand that it costs a certain amount of money to run a charitable organization, however if you are truly passionate about a cause you shouldn’t be thinking about your own personal gain in regards to revenue. So next time you donate to a cause look at the bigger picture and know where your money goes, and what it is going to fund. Think about the statistics and what it is that you really want when you get cancer. It’s pretty simple and can be summed up with one word: LIFE.

The view from our balcony at Lake Las Vegas!! Sunshine and happiness go hand in hand!!

Me and my mom amongst the Palm trees

Me and my mom.

Morning view from our deck, paradise!

So my princess noodle wanted to do Lego so we went and bought some lego. I was not into Lego as a child, however my goodness I am now hooked!! If you have not done Lego since childhood, buy some becaue it is quite fun, especially since they now have Lego for girls. Ok, laugh out loud if need be but I swear you'll enjoy it if you try it!!!!!

Fun at the park on a lovely day:)

Lex and little Lennox: So this sweet little soul brings so much happiness. Honestly, I could cuddle him all day, pure perfection:) Check out his story and spread the love: daysfilledwithsunshine.blogspot.com

Waiting for an MRI with my super stylish attire. Why cant results ever be straight forward??? Lets just say I can relate to Walter White from Breaking Bad, hahaha!! Don't worry I am not cooking meth, but can totally relate to the craziness of life!!
I had to add this picture just because. Zoom in because it is a little duck family!!! May just be the cutest thing ever and made me smile:) Best part is, just one week later look what I saw...
This may be a different duck family, but what are the odds of seeing another one less than a week later. It appears she's taking them to the park, hahaha. So darn cute!!!